#narcissism... or is it #responsibilitymomlife?
I often wonder I am a narcissist. Is that the right word? Growing up the outside perception was of a sheltered spoiled brat trouble maker (so I've been told). Through my adult life I've noticed a pattern of...feelings when in situations where an audience is occurring (whether small or big, us hosting or someone else), mostly left out and out of place...and in some sense scolded. But also envious, stressed, sad, and awkward. Now that I have a child, I have found that while they say, yes, you can bring her, they never seem to be prepared for her. This means that when the inevitable happens...I am usually the one that misses out due to needing to entertain her elsewhere. Do I just want the attention, to be a part of it all, all about me? Or is just adult responsible mom life stuff. When I brought this concept up to my husband in the recent past, he gave me a weird look and apparently found it an amusing notion as he told the rest of the company we were keeping (which also gave me a weird look). So maybe not. Maybe it's normal and I'm making a deal out of nothing. I am not real sure yet.