Monday Musings of this December

I must admit to back-logging my posts. I have been doing a lot of Pooh-like/Christopher Robin-like nothings, this month (and possibly November). The routines are basically the same so I am as busy as busy can be, though it is small normal routined everyday things (cleaning house, picking up, luna play, screens, reading, etc), so I have forgotten to post and have no real specific "new" life adventures to share. I have noticed a few things; such as, while luna is stubbornly refusing the toilet, she is has no problem (when she doesn't over think it) with clothes, seat buckles and while her destructiv-ness is  still strong, I have noticed her "reading" more and more, and again, she has one heck of a memory as she recites the video storyline she watches/hears in her play. She is still most comfortable doing anythings when she thinks no one is paying attention to her, and she is growing like a sunflower (which I found out the other day was a weed, but it is so pretty! Also google shows other pretty weeds too, so it isn't a lone in the pretty weed category!). 

This past week I noticed more socialization thoughts. The event dinner I went to...well I always/often forget that the clicks you hang out with seem to only go so far. Socialization is a, well it seems like an act on samene isolation: they need that person to person grouping but also find independence a thing that should be done (well maybe not other cultures so much?). Apparently the fact that my child and husband having a dinner out when I have these events (daddy, daughter date) was of interest and yet, when my table was gone and I went to hang out with the other table...I was like the interloper, hanging on the edge. Not that they didn't include be or weren't nice, however, I did see the tightening of the group in such ways of conversation and even stance (the table was full with slivers of openings). I also noticed that small talk is the way to go (even for reserved cultures or so I am told), and the smalltalk seems to change depending on the grouping. the event held mostly parents so the small talk was mostly parent talk. 

I have been thinking about that mindful natures too, maybe it is because I grew up in a family that is loud obnoxious,  and shows their love by it, as the louder and more obnoxious they get, the more they feel (strong-willed opinions, and harsh(ish) teasing ahoy!). I found myself attaching to those sorts of people. While my husband's family is a lot more quiet, my husband has very definite opinions and can be very...particular in his thinking. After the other day (in which I outwardly commented on questioning how long the informality of America's speech has been around), I noticed that, the habits we formed growing up have still prevailed (he was very put out with the apparent way I questioned it). According to the books I read, this is all basic "toxic" behavior, and should be gotten rid of, or at least checked. Again, I have no way of checking it as the only one that I can check is myself and I have yet to figure out when or how to change my natural tones and inflixion (as they seem to be the problem).